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Official waste of time.

I have just spent a good 4 hours debugging one function that turns:

yankee -D "oo\"d l e\'s" -went "2 town 2 buy him-self" -a pony --calledit=" \"macaroonis\' "

In to:

array(9) {
   ["yankee"]=>   bool(true)   
   ["D"]=>   string(10) "oo"d l e's"   
   ["w"]=>   bool(true)   
   ["e"]=>   bool(true)   
   ["n"]=>   bool(true)   
   ["t"]=>   string(21) "2 town 2 buy him-self"   
   ["a"]=>   string(4) "pony"   
   ["pony"]=>   bool(true)   
   ["calledit"]=>   string(12) ""macaroonis'" 

It’s official folks; I have lost my mind.